Online Dating – Sex on the First Date?

People ask me, “Why are you single? You’re attractive, intelligent and creative"? My reply is “I’m overqualified.”

sofeminine

Online dating is a great source of humour for me! Just when you think that it could possibly work, you’ve got to laugh!

I received a nice little note from a gentleman. He was nice looking, had a good job and hobbies – pretty normal and stable and was looking for a long term relationship. We exchanged lots of emails and then we decided to talk. This is when they usually disappear because online dating scammers are "always out of town"! Well, this one didn’t disappear; he talked and talked. And he was funny and smart.

We were planning to meet for coffee, but this is when it got weird. He was going to come up to my neighbourhood for coffee – good. But he wanted to meet after dinner – a little strange. But it got stranger… He kept talking about how after coffee, I could kidnap him and take him home! I still didn’t clue in that he was serious! The kidnap talk didn’t go away, it started to dominate the conversations. Finally, I said that I wasn’t going to kidnap him, and I had no intention of having sex with him the first time I met him. He was not delighted with me!

It truly never occurred to me that having coffee with an unknown person could be expected as a sex partner. But, you learn something every day.

I must be part squirrel, I attract all the nuts.

Hubpages

Make someone smile today.

Geri

I Thought He Was, But He Wasn’t

When dipping into the online dating pool, one must remember that anything can be polished online.

Quote Master

I have a classic online dating scam to share with you. I began communicating with a very nice gentleman. He was called Radford Oswald, age 63, living in Toronto and Swedish.

Radford was a widower. Ten years ago, his wife and daughter were killed in an accident. Unfortunately, Radford was a cardiac surgeon and couldn’t do anything to help his family. He was left with twin boys. Unable to stay in Sweden, he and the boys moved to Toronto.

No longer wanting to practice medicine, a friend of his in the States, got him interested in designing surgical suites for hospitals. When Radford and I started communicating, he was working on a job in Ottawa. We started texting or talking twice a day, and it was lovely. Before his Ottawa job was finished, he got a large job in South Africa. So, he finished the Ottawa job, came home to Toronto, and left for South Africa.

Everything was fine. Communicating with a 7-hour time change was difficult, but manageable. And then came the online dating scam. He called one day, and he was stressed. Radford had ordered materials from Turkey and they arrived, but he couldn’t access his bank account to get money to clear the goods! He wanted me to lend him the money. I said HELL NO! And I hung up.

Anytime someone asks you for money say HELL NO! There is NO REASON IN THE WORLD to give someone that you DON’T KNOW any money.

He kept texting for another day, showing me his bank account, and I must tell you that his documents looked good. But the bank account was from a little bank in Florida. No one who lives in Toronto and is Swedish has a bank account in Jacksonville or Orlando, Florida. 

So now I have an online dating scam to share with you. If you see his photo (probably with another name and another story) and his Toronto phone number 437-563-5663, report him to the company. I couldn’t report him because he took his profile down.

Online dating helps me meet and break up with someone without leaving the house.

Someecards

Make someone smile today.

Geri

Why I Quit Online Dating

Online dating is just as murky and full of lemons as finding a used car in the classifieds. Once you learn the lingo, it's easier to spot the models with high mileage and no warranty.

Laurie Perry

I’ve officially quit online dating. My profile is now deleted, never again to be resurrected. I know that online dating does work for some people, but I’m not one of those. My friends will no doubt be quite dismayed at my decision; not because they wouldn’t support it but because they’ll no longer be regaled by my online dating escapades. Amusement at life’s foibles will have to come from other sources.

Einstein’s definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. This sums up how I feel about online dating. I used to find the fake profiles, scammers and people lying about their ages, hobbies, interests and professions mildly entertaining, but no longer. Amusement has given way to annoyance and irritation. And so, it's time to go. I’ll leave online dating to those who are still hopeful that their Mr. or Ms Right is on Match, OKCupid, Plenty of Fish or the like.

In case you’ve bought into the hype that the only way people meet anymore is online, you couldn’t be more wrong. According to Pew Research, only 5% of Americans who are in a marriage or committed relationship say they met their significant other online. The overwhelming majority of relationships begin offline. According to Google Consumer Surveys the 3 most common ways that people meet are:

1. Through friends in common

2. Out in a social setting

3. Through work

The online dating chapter of my life is now closed. Instead of approaching dating as a mission, I’m just going to live my life and see what the universe has in store with me.

Nothing defines humans better than their willingness to do irrational things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs. This is the principle behind lotteries, dating, and religion.

Scott Adams

Make someone smile today.

Geri 

Online Dating Sites Refuse to Protect You From Scammers or Predators

It’s right there in the name. It’s not ‘Great Cupid’ or even ‘Good Cupid’. It’s OK Cupid.

Helen Hong, Comedienne

Let’s get real; online dating sites are in it for the money, whether they’re paid or free sites. And, they can be monetized in a multitude of ways including:

• Paid Memberships

• Premium Content or Add-On Features

• Advertising

• Affiliate Networks

• Live Events

The bottom line is that they’re all looking to make as much money as possible. And in order to make as much money as possible they have to show value. How do they show value? By the number of registered members of course! Remember, social media is just a numbers game and the one who has the most, wins. Online dating sites need to boast as many registered members as possible to attract new members, advertising dollars and the like. So even if they know that members are scammers or predators, it’s not in their best interests to delete their profiles from the site because that reduces their numbers which makes them less attractive to new members and advertising dollars.

The easiest way to identify scammers and online predators is to drag and drop their photos into Google Image Search. In fact I do that with anyone that contacts me on an online dating site, whether or not my alarm bells have gone off. And I have identified SEVERAL scammers and online predators who were either impersonating someone or using someone else’s photo. On every occasion that I identified one of these creeps, I reported them to the online dating sites and provided iron clad evidence - the URL to the person they were impersonating or to the location of where they absconded with the photo. NOT ONCE were any of these scammers or predators booted off the sites. Online dating sites don’t care about you or your safety; they only care about the money you can generate for them.

The moral of the story is that you have to look out for yourself. Be diligent and always do a Google Image Search. It’s free, easy to do and can save you a lot of grief.

Today, if you own a smartphone, you’re carrying a 24-7 singles bar in your pocket.

Aziz Ansari, Actor

Make someone smile today.

Geri

Rating the Online Dating Game

I can’t believe how convenient online dating is! Now my dream of finding love can be crushed more efficiently and in the privacy of my own home.

RottenECards

Every dating site brags that they’re responsible for the most relationships and marriages. Since there’s never been a scientific study that measures the effectiveness of each online dating site and provides empirical data as to the results, the dating site brag-a-thon continues. Here are a few less than scientific observations about the online dating sites that my friends and/or I have used.

Neil Clark Warren, founder of eHarmony, claims to be responsible for 5% of all marriages in the United States, but has no data to back up the claim. According to the Pew Research Center (which happens to be a reliable source of information and has the data to back up their statistics), 5% of Americans who are in a marriage or committed relationship say they met their significant other online. That’s 5% in total of all the online dating sites out there so there’s no way on God’s little acre that eHarmony could possibly back up their ridiculous claim. According to the experiences of my friends (I have never used eHarmony. I refuse to sign up for a year and pay way too much money for the privilege), eHarmony is the worst. They’ve met fewer people than on the other sites and none even had a second date as a result.

Plenty of Fish (POF) or Plenty of Minnows as I affectionately call it is the powerhouse of free dating sites. POF claims to have 3.5 million daily active users who have 9 million conversations every day. And they claim that every 2 minutes a couple confirms to POF that their relationship started on the service. Again, take the grandiose claims with a grain of salt. However, anecdotally, POF is the hands down winner in the success department. In my immediate circle of friends, there have been several long term relationships and a marriage. All I can say is that people are getting their money’s worth (it’s free) and their claims may indeed be accurate.

Match.com claims to have helped create 517,000 relationships - 92,000 marriages, and 1 million babies. However, the numbers that they quote are for the Match Group, not Match.com. And, what you may not know is that the Match Group bought OKCupid in 2011 and Plenty of Fish in 2015. So they now have the market cornered in the online dating world and their quoted statistics may not reflect Match.com, but the Match Group. What I found interesting was that the biggest user group at Match.com (according to Match) is the age range of 25-44 which makes perfect sense because none of my friends or I (in the 60ish age range) have had any success on Match.

OKCupid claims to have 1 million active members. One very odd statistic (at least to me) is that they boast that 58% of members indicated an interest in bondage in 2015. This is up 5% over the year before. For all of you who are into bondage, OK Cupid is the site for you. They offer no statistics about lasting relationships and marriage. What I find even more interesting is that one of my friends has had a bumper crop of dates on OKCupid. Perhaps we should have a chat about her predilection for bondage…

Based on your online dating profile I’m guessing literacy is not one of the characteristics we share.

QuotesGram.com

Make someone smile today.

Geri

Online Predators Are Trolling For You!

Online dating is just as murky and full of lemons as finding a used car in the classifieds. Once you learn the lingo, it's easier to spot the models with high mileage and no warranty.

LAURIE PERRY

You probably watch Dr. Phil and see women whose lives have been ruined by online dating predators. And, I’m sure that you think that it can’t happen to you; but it can happen to anyone. Online predators are out there on every dating website, and they’re trolling for you.

Just yesterday I got a message from an online predator. They’re usually pretty easy to identify and this one was no exception. English is supposed to be their first and only language, yet their profile and messages are clearly not written by a native English speaker. Below is the profile of the online predator that contacted me. Read the highlighted portions out loud and you’ll see what I mean.

Predator’s online dating profile:

I am positive, romantic, sensual and affectionate. I love my life so much! I like active life. I am loving, caring, reliable, funny, playful and very romantic. I like being playful and enjoy the moments life offers. I am really open person and always ready to help people who need me! I try to be always in a good mood. To tell the truth I like everything beautiful - nature, poetry, beautiful paintings! I dream to be a tender flower in hands of my beloved. I am intelligent, clever and well-mannered person. I am open to new people in my life and very communicative. A lot of women are really materialistic so I understand how difficult it might be for men to find a good woman.I would better support and love my partner! I really adore traveling and would be happy to visit many beautiful places together and have many romantic evenings! I am a romantic and a dreamy person. I like sitting somewhere near the sea and enjoying a really amazing landscape! I am a good friend and a good listener so you may not hesitate and write me because I am the one you need. For me the most important thing in life is love. I want to love and to be loved. I think love should be mutual and I hope to find my love here!

Most online predators are widowers and this one was no different. However, the most damning piece of evidence was his blatant identity theft. He used a photo that wasn’t his. How did I know that? You can search images on Google (Go to Google images and drag and drop the image into the search bar). I did an image search and found that the photo that he posted belonged to a British soldier at his Millie Award ceremony in 2012.

Below is the message that he sent me.

Hi gorgeous how're you doing out there ? I just had a look at your profile so i thought of sending you a message. I'm a widower and in the Canadian Army for 28 years.I'm currently stationed in Iraq where we are undergoing a secret mission.I've been here for 3 good years and will be coming home for good by the end of February 2016. When i come home i live around Ajax Ontario but i don't mind relocating or meeting you anywhere i can if the chemistry works out properly. I have one lovely daughter and two adorable grand children..Have a nice day and will be looking forward to read a message from you soon.Warn regards. Bryan

This is too ridiculous for words. Can you imagine a Canadian soldier on a secret mission in Iraq sending a message to anonymous person on an online dating site, telling them that he’s on a secret mission?

Beware of online predators. Always do a Google image search and pay attention to how the profile and messages are written. It's better to be safe than sorry. Good luck and happy dating!

So his profile said Thai, Indian and Chinese. He wanted a mail order bride, not dinner.

Tokki.com

Make someone smile.

Geri